Tormented For Your Life

2009-05-27T10:20:00.000-07:00

I feel like i've got no emotions.

GG

2009-04-18T11:36:00.000-07:00

Am i..?

Should i..?

Can i..?

What am i?

2009-04-11T10:10:00.000-07:00

If I Could Fly
Artist: Helloween

No fear, no pain
Nobody left to blame
I'll try alone
Make destiny my own
I learn to free my mind
Myself I now must find
Once more, once more

If I could fly
Like the king of the sky
Could not tumble nor fall
I would picture it all
If I could fly
See the world through my eyes
Would not stumble nor fail
To the heavens I sail

So here I am
In solitude I stand
I've got dreams inside
I need to realize
My faith has grown
No fear of the unknown
No more, no more

If I could fly
Like the king of the sky
Could not tumble nor fall
I would picture it all
If I could fly
See the world through my eyes
Would not stumble nor fail
I could revage my jail

If I could, if I could, fly
If I could, if I could, fly
If I could fly
Like the king of the sky
Could not tumble nor fall
I would picture it all
If I could fly
See the world through my eyes
Would not stumble nor fail
To the heavens I sail

If I could, If I could fly
Like the king of the sky
Could not tumble nor fall
I would picture it all
If I could fly
See the world through my eyes
Would not stumble or fail
I could revage my jail

If I could fly

2009-04-08T09:35:00.000-07:00

Tallulah
By: Sonata Arctica

Remember when we used to look how sun sets far away?
And how you said: "This is never over"
I believed your every word and I guess you did too
But now you're saying : "Hey, let's think this over"

You take my hand and pull me next to you, so close to you
I have a feeling you don't have the words
I found one for you, kiss your cheek, say bye, and walk away
Don't look back 'cause I am crying...

I remember little things you hardly ever do
Tell me why
I don't know why it's over
I remember shooting stars, the walk we took that night
I hope your wish came true, mine betrayed me

You let my hand go, and you fake a smile for me
I have a feeling you don't know what to do
I look deep in your eyes and hesitate a while...
Why are you crying?

Tallulah, It's easier to live alone than fear the time it's over, oo-ooh...
Tallulah, find the words and talk to me, oh, Tallulah,
This could be... heaven

I see you walking hand in hand with long-haired drummer of the band
In love with her or so it seems, he's dancing with my beauty queen
Don´t even dare to say you hi, still swallowing the goodbye
But I know the feelings still alive, still alive

I lost my patience once, so do you punish me now
I'll always love you, no matter what you do
I'll win you back for me if you give me a chance
But there is one thing you must understand

Tallulah, It´s easier to live alone than fear the time it´s over
Tallulah, find the words and talk to me ,oh, Tallulah,
This could be...

Tallulah, It´s easier to live alone than fear the time it´s over
Tallulah, find the words and talk to me ,oh, Tallulah,
This could be...

2009-04-01T09:16:00.000-07:00

I feel like a secondhand good.

2009-03-27T08:56:00.001-07:00

This is too neutral to feel like im alive.

2009-03-25T07:33:00.001-07:00

Sometimes you just lose it.

2009-03-12T04:56:00.000-07:00

Nothing much.
I was just thinking too much.

Dun worry im still the same.
And i still feel the same for you.
No matter what.

2009-02-06T07:55:00.001-08:00

5 more minutes to the big day. Chiong ah bboys!! We can all do it!

-gibberish gibberish gibberish-

2009-01-08T08:36:00.001-08:00

Let me swim out of this whirlpool

2009-01-07T00:50:00.001-08:00

Its time to be in control.
Its time to be at peace with yourself.
Its time to start afresh. Back to what you wanted long ago.
There will be marks reminding yourself of the past, its how you use it or you forget it.
Its time to make or break.
Its time to be in control again.

2009-01-04T07:05:00.000-08:00

The feeling of regret is painful.

2008-12-28T08:57:00.001-08:00

I'll never reveal my fear. Or will i?

The day is coming. And i thought i never cared.

2008-11-19T06:41:00.000-08:00

): i just lost money(again) on mahjong. WHERE IS MY LUCK! TT

this is outrageous, recently i've been spending so much lol, on clothes and other stuff. But all worth it.Especially 60 bucks for Felix's shoes O: and some on screwed up shirts lol.

floorthelove was okay i guess. Bboy not very exciting unfortunately, but the locking was !!!. Hiphop was cool too, but popping lol, dunno why dint interest me that much. haha not worth 15 bucks but i guess. That's Singapore. overpriced stuff lol.

Only one cypher throughout the whole thing,and i was there purely for the cyphers. lol therefore i was quite heated up. When i saw a chance to go in, i took it. Went inside the cyphers like around 5 times? lol but i was wack -.- and i showed the cock to someone cuz he was like battling wilson lol. On hindsight wasn't really good but it was just natural when i saw wilson being battled lol. After that we just shook hands like nothing happened, as all bboys do. That's why bboying is a dope dance (:

2008-11-12T22:31:00.000-08:00

Im damn bored at home, seriously. fuck. go school also sian, stay home also sian.

>.<

i need some life seriously, otherwise im gonna freaking turn into some undead. And so many people's going overseas next week le, that's even worse. >.>

So bored that im resorting to counting the cars that passed by the roads near my house at 3 am in the morning -.- i shud go sleep earlier but i dun want to.

Im stuck at book 2 of twilight series cuz i hate the new character that has come into the book lolol. Got that feeling dun want to continue but still forcing myself to.

Got tons of hw, newsweek, nat geog havent read and WHERE'S MY THE ECONOMIST?!?! so long havent come wtfreak.

zzzzz everything seems so distant from me already. ): that void feeling is back again. sigh.

maybe i shud just look forward to felix tmr and floorthelove on sat. sigh.

2008-11-10T06:16:00.000-08:00

lol yay i finally changed my blogskin but i think the url totally doesn't fit -.-

my previous posts are all really really retarded i want to delete them all RAHHHH

my blog's dying cuz i really dunno what to blog ):

sian, life's so boring that i finished book 1 of the stephenie meyer's twilight series lolol. >.<

maybe i shud jsut dance my hols away O:

Sometimes you wonder whether education really works.

2008-09-18T08:43:00.000-07:00

I need somewhere to say this.

Im turning into a metalhead ._. ironically my blogskin doesn't match this sudden change of personality but im too lazy to change lol >.<

Im like on a progression trend

pop->pop punk->alternative rock->post-hardcore->metalcore->emo->now metal lol.

It would be nice to talk to people who are metalheads. And especially those who really really know their stuff. I need more intro into music! i know too little ): im still a beginner in appreciating music so pls accept me into the community lol.I still have a pop/pop punk ear ): so it will take some time getting into this but im willing :D

Terrance and Casey fellow metalheads pls guide me :D

Master of Puppets by Metallica = 8 minutes of pure orgasmic music

2008-06-23T07:30:00.000-07:00

Walking down this road
Trudging through history
The dark silent night
The ticking clock
The murmurs of sorrow
The breaking of heart
The wallowing in tears
The knifely experience
Standing by the pillar
Walking,walking
So alone,so lonely
Memories imprinted

2008-06-15T10:39:00.000-07:00

Drifting, drifting away
So far,so far away.
Swimming,swimming for it.
Catch it,trying to catch it.
Grasping,grasping so desperately.
Losing it.
Aimless.
Empty.
Reaching,so futile.
Praying,so futile.

Drifting,drifting away.
Floating,floating for survival.

2008-06-10T07:35:00.000-07:00

So many people blogging about bsp camp 07. 1 year has passed,so fast,memories stayed,friendships continued.When we grow up,will we look back upon these memories we created,friendships forged over just these 3 days.Our outings,birthday celebrations,so much more.We had reunion dinner together.We celebrated each other birthdays.We sang,we cycled,we played.We studied together.Along this one year,it dwindled;people became busy,with studies,with cca.As time continues to pass,will it just die out like that.Like a candle flame.

Freak i could nearly cry when i watched the bsp camp 07 montage video.

I felt my empty shell drifting around.

2008-05-24T10:08:00.000-07:00

What do i feel?
Nothing,nothing at all.
Surprisingly.
Is that good or bad ):

i feel like writing poems lol.maybe i should try writing some day.

2008-05-18T07:20:00.000-07:00

The mountain.
Started at the bottom and began climbing.
Slowly and steadily and picked up a gradual pace.
Reached the middle but began to fall.
Falling at such a gradual and steady pace.
So many obstacles in front.
Hesitation.Deliberation.
Progression or giving up.
Attempt to climb from this point again.
Or just drop and start afresh.
Or will the mountain just move away from you,letting you fall all the way,without the chance of coming back up.
Holding on.Stuck.In a dilemma.
Progression or giving up.
Progression's a pain to endure.
Giving up's a pain that hurts.
It's a time of choice.
No time to cry,no time to rest.
Pick up the pace or just let go.

Sometimes don't you just hate yourself.
You walk along the road and you fall into a hole.
Embarrassed, you climb up and cover up the hole,telling yourself you won't fall into it ever again.
The next time you walk along this road whistling,
You fall into it again,countless times.
Or is it just me.Repeating the same mistakes over and over again.
You only want to grasp something when you're going to lose it.
Yet it turns out you could only grasp thin air.

Sometimes sometimes its really too late to apologize.

2008-05-09T08:53:00.001-07:00

Its a wrong time to feel like this.

2008-04-24T08:58:00.000-07:00

I dunno why im feeling like this and i dun like it. )):

and HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY JIE! (: happy 17th chit. hope you liked the cake,and all the presents (:

2008-04-05T11:13:00.000-07:00

You feel so small when you look at the people that have achieved so much,that are able to exceed normal human expectations.

Yet you feel so inspired because you see that there's nothing there's impossible for humans to do. No matter what,humans can do it,even it seems humanly impossible.

This world's great yet sad at the same time.

Read up on Alain Robert. He'll show you why human can exceed boundaries and why humans are so great.

2008-03-14T12:40:00.000-07:00

And i forgot to apologise for biting andrew today.I like bit his set right after he finshed his. Sorry andrew.The bite was not on purpose to piss you off or anything, i hope you understand O:

Oh and i watched step up 2.The dancing is really really imba and for the whole movie we were just going dope here and there. 1st movie of 2008 for me. surprise surprise. Haven't watched a movie since....the last time i watched(around december).sigh @ life.

2008-03-14T12:15:00.000-07:00

I realised i can't reflect my bboy standard as well as shenhong, well different people reflect differently. Have i improved over these few months as a bboy? The culture,the musciality,the sets,the moves,the freshness.It is impossible to tell myself i have not improved,but i still feel that something is amiss, that im not doing stuff right,drilling enough and stuff.I have managed some form of drilling,like my 3 and 2 steps,but i know it's still not enough.I need more variations,to be fresher than fresh.(weird lol)I see my fellow bboys become fresh,despite not watching bboy videos as much as i do(im a eboy O:),their sets are really clean and good.I feel alot as a bboy now,i sort of understand the culture,now i need to understand how the battle works.Today i saw 3HM vs Foot For Thought.In my opinion, FFT won.but the judges(terrance and andrew)gave the victory for 3HM,which made me realised i have not understood the culture enough.

Oh seniors,jiayou for floorskillz later.You all are going to soo rock it(: weird im blogging at like 3 plus am in the morning lol.

The holidays have been enriching and fulfilling, in leisure time i guess.Not in any homework sense cuz i admit to not doing any homework past these point of time cept a few.I really dun want school to reopen because im going to burn myself out(everybody's going to).sigh so much have happened these few months and im still trying to cope with all of this.Im so glad there's bboy to release me from everything. It's like this angel that kills the evil in you,but after a few hours,when you feel shagged and can't bboy anymore,and you're forced to do your work,you really wish that angel comes back again to help you.But sadly the angel can't be around whole day long ):

Last saturday was RF 10th anniversary jam.It was so dope that i really have nothing to describe it.If i were to check the thesaurus for more synonyms for dope,i doubt i'll find any.Battles are not just about one on ones,when the routines come out,you can see how sick it is.It is pure imbaness to synchro stuff together,which is what dancing is purely about.Even bboying,where cyphering and one on one battles are all about yourself,when its a crew fight,a good routine will be able to own any set that the next person comes out with.As with the case of Vietnam vs Fuyo,same with the rest of the j1s,i thought fuyo was good,clean and was going to win it until vietnam came out with the routine and we were totally shocked,flabbergasted and in awe.(lol)

Then the next day i went for Broken Social Scene's concert.It was good,fantastically good.Indie music is really really imba,mixing different instruments together to create such a perfect soothing sound,especially when you listen to BSS or Neutral Milk Hotel adding the trumpet into their music,it's sooo beautiful.Sadly at this point of time,my brain screams pop punk/alternative rock so sadly on that day i couldn't really enjoy myself to the tunes of BSS.Though i would like to say it was good,really really good and they said they were coming back,i hope they will ^^. Next up, Paramore pleaseeeeeee come. Anberlin can you come back again omg. I would chiong for these two if they ever come.On a smaller note, i hope Just Surrender comes too,because Just Surrender's music is just too beautiful,but Just Surrender coming to Singapore is like only a small small glimmer of hope ):

The next few days were just bboying,bboying bboying,and more bboying.Added with the late night inhouse dota games and the occasional hiphop practices.The whole week was just about dance and dance.Now im contemplating quitting hiphop.Being in hiphop division now would only serve as a namesake for me.I cannot push myself to do hiphop nor acquire any motivation to really dance hiphop.If i would to continue staying in hiphop,i would only become a hindrance rather than dance properly with the other people.If i really quit hiphop im not sure whether i'll disappoint people,but i would like to say sorry first if i decide to quit.I know what really happened that got me into hiphop division.If i quit i want to say sorry for taking up the slot in hiphop division that so many people are dying to get.Anw if i ever quit i would probably quit after dance night because i dun want to pangseh them at this point of time.

2008-03-01T19:27:00.000-08:00

FUZEBOX!!! Congratulations to fuzebox for winning third place in danceworks ytd (:

Felt really ecstatic when i heard fuzebox won third place. Could totally feel what they were feeling at that point of time. Dance is really a great thing. Its like once you start dancing, you can never stop. Remove dance and it feels empty and nothing. And dance can convey so many languages and bond everybody together to choreograph one so beautiful dance.

Same as with bboy.Im feeling as though bboy is my life and i can't stop doing bboy.Can't stop forcing myself to improve and be a better bboy.Learning the culture,facing the fears and to better yourself.I need to drill myself, drill and drill until my footworks are cleaner.Im disappointed cuz i have not been drilling myself, though i tell myself that i will drill every single time i bboy.Which has not been happening.DRILL DRILL OMG O:

anw congratulations to fuzebox again. (: fuzebox rocks!

2008-01-29T06:53:00.000-08:00

I like making mountains out of a molehill.

Im speechless when it comes to expressing myself. I had alot to say, now it seems like i swallowed them all.

2008-01-25T07:45:00.001-08:00

The 3 days of torment are finally gone! HELLO BBOY, here i come (:

And fellow bboys who got in, congrats, and hope to enjoy training together, with friends like karlton, chuan khim, hongliang, jonneo, huihua, andre and shenhong, i won't fail to see why i wouldn't chiong bboy after school everyday :D

And those who dint get in, do not be disappointed, your love for bboy should not die just because MAD dint accept you. Self-learn and practise by yourself. Someday you'll be performing for all of us. M.A.D <3

The icing would be perfect sweet if hiphop results come out and im inside :D okay impossible anyway. HAHA no worries bboy <3

2008-01-24T07:04:00.000-08:00

TMR! OMG TMR! i hope something good comes out. Tmr's the day but i can't help feeling afraid.

There's too much stuff for me to be bothered about now, than homework. If only school was about cca and doing the stuff you like, then i would sleep in school everyday.

It's so sad that people have emotions. Yes, very sad. Though emotions bring the spark in life, the ups and downs, but its so heartwrenching to see people you can't cheer up, to see people that words from you to them does not matter. People usually only have a few people to care about, but i want to do something greater than that. Out of my reach? Not sure. Does my dream job still stay as a possible job? Or would i never be able to qualify for it. If now, my words doesn't register in anybody's twisting world of emotions.

On a side note, Just Surrender rocks (:

2008-01-19T08:40:00.000-08:00

Oh no, this couldn't be more unexpected
And I can tell that I've been moving in so slow
Don't let it throw you off too far
Cause I'll be running right behind you

Could this be out of line? (Could this be out of line?)
To say you're the only one breaking me down like this
You're the only one I would take a shot on
Keep me hanging on so contagiously

Oohhh, when I'm around you I'm predictable
Cause I believe in loving you at first sight
I know it's crazy but I'm hoping to..
To take a hold of you

Could this be out of line? (Could this be out of line?)
To say you're the only one breaking me down like this
You're the only one I would take a shot on
Keep me hanging on so contagiously

Oh you're everything I'm wanting
Come to think of it, I'm aching
On account of my transgression..
Will you welcome this confession?

Could this be out of line? (Could this be out of line?)
To say you're the only one breaking me down like this
You're the only one I would take a shot on
Keep me hanging on so contagiously

Could this be out of line? (Could this be out of line?)
To say you're the only one breaking me down like this
You're the only one I would take a shot on
Keep me hanging on so contagiously

2008-01-06T08:07:00.000-08:00

Someday i might crumble without anybody knowing why.

2008-01-02T07:34:00.000-08:00

What can i say? Im feeling so alright. (:

Words that are nice to hear never last.